If you know me at all, you know that I am a firm believer that our emotions create our physical symptoms. It was no surprise this past holiday season that I ended up with a sinus infection. Bitterness had become me. (Yes I have those moments too!)
Once we create an energy in the physical body, there is a process to begin healing: recognize the emotion, honor the emotion and move through the emotion by transforming it back into love. So I practiced what I preach. I recognized my emotion for what it was (resentment turned to bitterness), I honored the energy it was attached to and I began to focus on what I loved about the situation so I could begin to transform it. (There is always something to love about every situation if we search deep enough.)
Everything was going quite well. The energy was moving and I could feel myself healing, except for a persistent cough that refused to go away. From experience, I know that when something will not heal, it is because the energy that created it is not getting the attention it needs. Obviously I had more work to do.
I searched for the answer and still I was baffled. Although my body was healing, my cough persisted. I am also a firm believer in “ask and you will receive”, so I began to ask, “What am I missing? Is there something I need to speak?” Sometimes the answers come in the most unusual places.
The next evening during a nightly coughing spell, Bill lovingly began to rub my back. He is compassionate like that. As he massaged my spine, his hand touched a spot that felt .. well...tender. “Stop! Go back to that spot! I think you hit on something!”
Sure enough, as he moved back over my spine, at the 4th vertebrae in my neck, there it was.. an area that was sore to the touch. “Use your fist and press on that area for me, please!” I was sure he found the spot where my bitterness was held.
Bill did not understand why this was so important. He often thinks my beliefs are a bit weird. “Seriously? Do you actually believe the back of your neck is connected to your cough?”
I thought that an odd question, “How could the back of my throat not be connected to the front of my throat?” I also thought it funny that divinity was using my non-believer Bill as my guidance system.
As he honored my request and continued to massage my sore spot, I felt the energy begin to move. The bitterness that I had hidden was found, and I knew exactly what to do: give my bitterness the love it needed. With each new cough, I massaged my hidden “bitterness spot.”
Slowly, my sore spot moved from the fourth vertebrae to the third, and then the second, until it was right at the top of my spine. From the top of my spine, it began its downward shift into the lymphatic glands in my neck. Bitterness was leaving my body through the system that was charged to flush it away.
This experience taught me that old resentments and bitterness can be stored in our craniosacral fluids. Is this a hiding spot for old energy waiting to be discovered? Do we hide these energies so well that we cannot find them on our own?
As my healing progressed, I realized that this secret spot brought me to a bitter memory of my past, a memory I had not thought about for many years. Yet here it was revealing itself at just the appropriate moment. Obviously it was time to let it go. I did so by allowing myself to express my thoughts and feelings about a situation that occurred a long time ago. From there I refocussed my attention on the joys of my present hoping to fill my fluids with love.
Not surprising, when I arrived in Denver, I found my daughter Shannon suffering from the same chronic cough which had persisted for over a week. I knew exactly what to do. I began to massage her spinal column and asked her to tell me when she felt a sore spot.
“There it is, Mom.” Her bitterness was found. For five minutes, I worked the energy up through her spinal column. By later that afternoon, her cough improved noticeably. We took the time to speak about her feelings from the past, and each day she continued to heal.
As we heal deeper and deeper into unchartered territory, old resentments and bitterness from the past are ready to reveal themselves in all of us. Will we recognize them for what they are? Or will we continue to blame, resent and be bitter over what they are not?
For more information about the craniosacral fluids visit: