Caroline and I worked on her control, rigid, perfectionism Beech layer many years ago. And for many years following, I did not see Caroline. There are many reasons why a person may take a break from vibrational healing; we may end up in places that feel discomforting, we may see patterns that we prefer to avoid, or we may simply want to try other modalities.
About two weeks ago, Caroline contacted me and asked if we could work together again. She confided that for quite some time she was self diagnosing and self medicating using flower essences and cell salts herself. These are the flowers she was using:
- Walnut for the changes she was making in life
- Elm when she was feeling overwhelmed by life changes
- Larch for self confidence while making changes
- Rock Water for that “never good enough” feeling
- Beech for self judgments
- Chicory when her victim role emerged
- Rescue Remedy for calming
I was impressed by Caroline’s knowledge of the essences and her determination to recognize and work toward changing her imbalances, one flower at a time (or maybe seven!). While using the essences, she felt she was seeing results and was able to move energy that appeared out of nowhere. I was curious, “Why, then, do you feel the need to work with me again?” She was quite certain about her answer:
“I feel as though I’m stuck, like I am going round an round on a merry-go-round, and I want to get off.” She knew she was moving energy, however, her old patterns were constantly re- emerging. “I think I need your expertise with the flowers to get to the core of the issue. I feel whatever that core is, it is ready to emerge. I just can’t seem to get to it myself.” We went right to work and Caroline entered an “Agrimony” layer.
As we dig deeper and deeper into old energies, each of us will meet our Agrimony “burial” ground. It is in the Agrimony energy that we bury those aspects of ourself that we have been ashamed of throughout life. We may have buried them hoping to never see or feel them again. Yet to heal, we have to learn to love all of our self, even that part of us that feels ashamed. So to heal vibrationally, we must unbury that which we have pretended no longer exists. Why? Because pretending “it” no longer exists is a lie and lies have a tendency to create pain in the physical body.
Energy cannot be extinguished nor can it be eliminated; energy cannot be denied. Energy must be recognized, honored and then transformed into something else. Agrimony can assist with the transformational process. With Agrimony’s help, Caroline experienced a very powerful way to move her buried energy. This is Caroline’s Agrimony story which begins 9 days after she began her layer:
“On Friday I woke up with a rapid pulse - 120 bpm! My blood pressure was fine 94/67, but the pulse was strange because I had just gotten up and hadn't run around or exercised or exerted myself at all. I tried deep breathing and relaxing and got it down to 80 bpm which is still high for doing nothing. I ... was feeling anxious. I took my 10 drops of Agrimony and I remembered (you told me that) ....Agrimony (may) help me release .. suppressed anxiety.
“After my husband left for the office, I experienced a HUGE release! From the depths of my being surged wave after wave of screams and wailing! It was unbelievable and not a little scary! I went with the flow (had little choice at this point!) and let it all come out until there was no more left. And then...it was absolutely amazing - I felt light and clear and not the least bit upset at all! I calmly decided to not go into work and instead decided to stay home, put my bathing suit on, and relax all day in the yard on my lounge chair reading and playing and doing nothing if I wanted.
“I haven't been able to relax like that in such a long time! The thing that I find amazing also, is that my eyes weren't puffy from the crying and I felt really good! The weather was absolutely beautiful - a perfect summer day - and I felt so fortunate to be able to enjoy it so peacefully. My pulse returned to normal - 70 bpm.
“I've thought about what you said about the other flowers just treating the symptoms, that Agrimony was what I needed to heal this layer. It baffles me that I could have stored all that angst for who knows how long?!”
For as long as she can remember guilt, responsibility, rigidity and anxiety have ruled Caroline’s every thought and behavior. She did not know how to function without these aspects of herself. Her personal needs were non-existent, and perfectionism in her home and work consumed her life. It was all quite exhausting and debilitating.
The Agrimony allowed Caroline to release this energy that has been pent up for so long... much like a volcanic eruption. Once released, her energy was clear and free. It was only after her explosion that Caroline felt safe and secure putting her own needs before those of her work or home. This is a new way of thinking and feeling for Caroline; I hope she learns to trust the altered realty she is creating.
Note from Linda: I have no doubt there is more energy buried deep within Caroline that will continue to be uncovered and released, which is okay because truthfully, we have a whole lifetime in which to do it in!